Over the past few weeks, I've been reflecting on vocation. Vocation may be a career or occupation that God calls us into and each of us has a unique calling (see older post on vocation and calling). While I understood that I had a calling something was missing. I experience frustration. I feel lost. Even fear. It stems from anxiety that I am somehow not fulfilling my vocation especially when things weren't going as planned or when I encountered failure or when you realize there are people who are scheming behind your back or use you for their benefit. I find myself comparing myself to others and feeling inadequate or unable to "measure up" to the success of others. More, others seemed to be further in fulfilling their calling—yet I seem to be “missing the mark.” My work seemed dull at times and at other times it was frantic and stressful. So, we spend time worrying or blindly trying to fill the gap between who we are today, and who we are created to be. However, is the being who we think is created to be who God desires us to be? Who says that I need to make a certain income, drive a particular car, or a hold a particular title in a company to be considered successful? Does God even care about that stuff? Are those things really just false idols and projections of a false self? Who are we if those things that give us identity today suddenly vanish?
During prayer time with some of my Brothers in
Christ, the Spirit gave me the word--Beatitude: or
"Be-Attitude". Our society rewards those who accomplish
and achieve monumental challenges and goals especially those who relentlessly
pursue their "dream job" or lifestyle. Our doing often defines who we
are because our culture and society says those things are important. And
while we shouldn't neglect the doing--it needs to come from our being.
Our "BE-attitude" reminded me of the importance of our being--who we
are In Christ and our identity (and security of our identities) in relationship
with the Creator and as God’s children. It is also about our attitude
as we live out our being. Our vocation, therefore, is concerned
less about what we accomplish and do--the doing and the goal--but living daily
with an attitude of being. More, we live out our vocation when
God is at the centre of our lives.
How do we live each day with a "BE-attitude"?
And how do we make sense of this in light of the beatitudes in Matthew 5?
To live as beings (and not doings) necessitates
us to journey into a deeper understanding of who we are and whose we are.
This may require us to give up the doing temporarily--to stop and evaluate our vision and values. It may simply be stepping back each day to
take time to reflect on what and why we do what we do. What gives us energy and what sucks it dry? This will require discernment. It will also take time as we wrestle with
ourselves and with God. What I’m
proposing is a journey inward and to identify those things in our lives that
give us (perceived?) stability, comfort, status, and so forth and then let them
go. Here, I am not saying to give all
your money away or sell your possessions—that’s between you and Jesus. What I am advancing is both a mental and
spiritual exercise of releasing our grip on our credentials, masks, accolades
and accomplishments of the past and all that has formed our identity up to this
point—and to offer them to God. It means coming before God, humbly stand
before the Creator as if we are naked. While
we are naked, we acknowledge God’s work in our lives, our strengths as well as those
faults, limitations, weakness and sin that corrupt us. For some
this move to understand our being is more frightening because we are left
vulnerable before God. For some, this move is more frightening before
their coworkers and friends than before God.
It can be dark. It can feel
lonely (but the Spirit is with us). Sometimes it is frustrating because you want to solve it immediately and run away from the uncomfortable feeling of restlessness. And before God we open our hands, signalling
to God that we are ready to receive, we then say "Father God, thank you
for loving me. This is me. Here I
am. " To live out of our being is to know that we are God's
child and that His grace is enough. Stay there. Stay there as long
as you need. Be patient. I find that entering into that space and
rest brings healing and comfort. But
while I'm in that place of rest... Christ's teachings in Matthew 5 - his
infamous Sermon on the Mount-begins to take form in my life and where I
experience God's shalom and comfort.
2 And he opened his mouth and taught them,
saying:3 “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.4
“Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.5 “Blessed are the
meek, for they shall inherit the earth.6 “Blessed are those who hunger and
thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied.7 “Blessed are the
merciful, for they shall receive mercy.8 “Blessed are the pure in heart, for
they shall see God.9 “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called
sons of God.10 “Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness' sake,
for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.11 “Blessed are you when others revile you
and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil against you falsely on my
account. 12 Rejoice and be glad, for your reward is great in heaven, for
so they persecuted the prophets who were before you.
Christ-likeness is not about being relevant and
spectacular to others, achieving wealth or power or status, or the way we
dress; Jesus' similarly faced the same temptations in the desert and was
victorious over Satan. Rather, it seems from the beatitudes that we live
each day with a different posture and attitude--one that recognizes we are who
God has created us to be and that we belong to God, loved by God, and depend on
God for our existence. Where we are today and who we are today, is
precisely where God intended us to be. I seems to me that God allow us to be "poor in spirit", "to mourn", "hunger and thirst for righteousness" and so on; those words aren't typically used to describe happy and cheery feelings. Our "Be-Attitude" is an acceptance of this reality. It is a tension. Our
vocation, therefore, is less about what we do but our daily lives oriented, IN
right-relationship and dependence on, the one who calls. If we're still trying to fill the gap between
the now and future--stop it! (I am reminding myself too and stop comparing
yourself to others--live YOUR life as God intended it and not someone else's.) It
doesn’t mean that God leaves us as we are as the Spirit will continue the work
of sanctification and molding of our characters to be like Christ’s and to
become who God intended us to be. So
there is a sense of being and becoming—a now and not yet. From that place of being, we step into our
workplaces and live each day with the power and confidence (blessed) to be who
we are, to live each day in faith, hope and love, and to embrace and care for
our neighbours and to love them as God does. From our being we also
receive the strength and courage (with God's help) to confront injustice and
evil even if it means we face persecution and humiliation. More, it is
from that place of being, we can speak truth (pure in heart) without fear and
to act (do) without judgement of ourselves (having and showing mercy) and
others (peacemakers)--to be the salt and light on the earth (v13-16).
This may indeed be the path less traveled but have courage because Christ walks
with you through it all and will give you strength each and every day.
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